Untouched image
hands entwined
Our selves our future
We held close
Together we laugh
We could always play pretend
A self confessed lie
A truth to you and me

An act of kindness
pretending like you care
A simple thing
but it doubles as a devils snare
Wish I could escape
But I keep on tumbling down
this situation, Patience,
Held against the ground

Sometimes I hate being alone
But the crowds of people scare me
On no ones malicious intent but my own, I separate myself from society

Bury me under my feelings, create a mask out of my fragmenting memory. It scares me sometimes, how messed I can be. I am frightened of not waking the next morning, I am frightened and I will hurt myself, lock me up, please don't through away the key, I am frightened by loneliness ...I am okay I swear

What should be a happy place
Is where sadness abounds
It's sorta melancholic
No longer safe no longer sound
If I try to force myself
to awake from this fever dream
Can I put the blame on you
Pretend not too be me

Is it worth it
Am I okay
Am I actually worth anything

Cause I don't see the point in this
Of going on, this hopelessness
I want to die, to fade away
To fade...to fade

Am I selfish? I guess I am. I thought I was getting better. I thought I had finally found a way out! A way that didn't involve hurting myself or others.... But it seems that as always the way out has been blocked. Once again I am caved in.

It feels like it had caved in on top of me, like I am being crushed... Crushed by... Well I would like to call it sadness, pain, anything. But I can't, I am being crushed by nothingness and an overwhelming sense of loneliness. Which is fucked in its own way. I have good friends, even if I don't have many. I still feel lonely though. I feel like a shell. I peel like my insides, they are burning to dust and the light at the end of the tunnel is hell.